Text to My Girlfriends

I live for a good short cut. I don’t want the road less traveled - slightly traveled will do. Like I was a big fan of Rachel Ray’s 30 minute meals. It was an interesting meal but quick. It’s really how I like to live. So when it came to Sis’s birthday cake, I was looking for a corner to cut that wouldn’t take away from the homemade vibe. I decided on a box cake, but homemade frosting.  Frosting really makes or breaks a cake. It’s what separates muffins from their glamorous cousins - the cupcakes. And since it was Baby Sis’s first birthday, the frosting was the most important part. I mean she is eating with her hands. We won’t get into the Buttercream vs. Whip Cream debate today. Honestly, I don’t have time to tell you why buttercream is the clear winner - just know Sis’s cake had bettercream on it. As for the cake, I bought a box of Funfetti and baked it according to the box instructions in 2 6in rounds. I like to set my timer for the lowest time in the suggested range. I find that...

I won’t lie to you franns, when I get a text like that I just about die. You never really know what’s going to be said and my mind flies a mile a minute!  I do a wonderfully terrible job of speculating. I imagine the worst possible outcome, always. ALWAYS. The more variables, the worse my imagination gets. So say we see someone standing up in the moonroof of a car. You may think it looks fun or maybe they’re going to mess up their hair. I think the car will get rear ended, they’ll go flying, land in the road, and get run over. I’m extreme. I catraphize like nobody's business. So you can only imagine what I was like when I thought about delivering Baby Sis. I was so convinced that I was going to die that I had my will drafted and purchased life insurance.  I had already had a complicated pregnancy. A low lying placenta, chronic hypertension, A GLOBAL PANDEMIC. There was a lot going on but what transpired was never on my radar.  Because of my hypertension, my doctor request...